Facing the Holidays

The holidays are here; Christmas decorations displayed give us the clue. I wonder where Thanksgiving went in the stores that concentrate on Christmas. I have not feasted yet on the Thanksgiving meal.

How is your soul at this season?                          

As the holidays approach, you may have a sense of dread about the upcoming days. Facing the holidays can be like looking at track hurdle and not being sure if you can jump it. This time of year brings an overwhelming task list and for some, holidays can surface a fresh awareness of our loss, causing sadness. We may experience regret or anxiety when we think of this festive time of year. Whether you are not looking forward to the tasks ahead or grieving a loss this year or both, you are not alone.

In addition, we may experience guilt or shame for not being full of joy and holiday spirit. I experience those feelings when I tell myself, “I am supposed to be happy with a grateful heart”. With so much to do, I can quickly succumb to anxiety.  Similarly, thinking of loved ones who will not be with me this season brings sorrow.

Holidays bring mixed emotions

It’s okay not to be in a continual state of “happy”. Our emotions tell us one thing and our head tells us another thing.  We don’t feel like being grateful and joyful; however, it is okay to acknowledge those feelings.

One of the best examples of this is in Psalm 13, a psalm of lament. The writer pours out his complaint to God, telling of his feelings of abandonment, anguish and sorrow. Maybe with tears running down his face, he acknowledges his hurt with frank words from the gut.

How long will you forget me, Lord? Forever?
    How long will you hide your face from me? Psalm 13:1 CEB

I often lament my “too do list”. Do you?

I mourn the loved ones who will not be at the table this year. Do you?

Holidays bring mixed emotions

I discovered that writing my own lament is helpful, expressing all my aggravation of the long lists of “to do’s” along with naming my grief.

It is interesting to note that the Psalmist, after an honest protest, verbalizes his trust and thanksgiving.

But I have trusted in your faithful love.
    My heart will rejoice in your salvation.
Yes, I will sing to the Lord
    because he has been good to me. Psalm13:5-6 CEB

Voicing our gratitude when we are in a low mood is a sacrifice. Our feelings tell us one thing, but with our mouth we can offer thanksgiving. I call that a sacrifice of praise.

In no way does verbalizing our thanksgiving minimize our sadness or loss. In no way does gratitude mean we are without frustration. We are not denying what is in our heart.

Voicing gratitude can be a sacrifice of praise

When I praise, thanking a good, and loving God, my feelings slowly change, gratitude wells up in me. Naming the people whom I am grateful for, listing provisions for my household and mentioning other blessing that I don’t deserve creates a different mood in me. Not only do I bless God when I express thanksgiving, but also I begin to change with an adjusted focus. We still have our “to do list” but our attitude is better. We still grieve our losses but we are reminded of the treasured memories for which we are thankful for.

We have a compassionate Heavenly Father, who is faithful and who is working in each of our lives to sustain us. A new perspective and new focus comes as we recall who God is.

I challenge you to spill out your lament about facing the holidays. Try it. Verbalize your lament or write it in a letter. Then I challenge you to list the ways God cares for you, the grace Jesus gives you and the mercy found in knowing our Loving Lord. Offer a sacrifice of thanksgiving. In the beginning, you might not experience a joyful heart but after, you will be more grateful.

A prayer:

Dear Lord,

You know my thoughts and dreads about the holidays. At times, I am flooded with loneliness and grief. How long will I feel this way? I am honest with you, not denying my emotions. May you comfort me by giving me strength through the days ahead. I need your grace to carry me. In contrast to my fears and frustrations, I want to offer a sacrifice with a focus on all your mercy. In contrast to my grief, I want to express my appreciation for who you and what you have done. I will trust in your unfailing love and goodness. At times, I cry out to you with tears: “thank you, thank you, thank you”.

Amen

Click on this beautiful song called “Thank You” by Hillsong Worship.

Lyrics

Thank You for Your kindness
Thank You for Your mercy
Thank You for the cross
Thank You for the price You paid

Thank You for salvation
Thank You for unending grace
Thank You for Your hope
Thank You for this life You gave

There is no one like You
There is no one like You, God
All my hope is in You
Jesus, Jesus

Thank You for Your promise
Thank You for Your favor
And thank You for Your love
And everything You’ve done for me

There is no one like You
There is no one like You, God
All my hope is in You
Jesus, Jesus, Jesus, Jesus

To Your name
We give all the glory
To Your name
We give all the praise

You’re alive
Our God everlasting
So let Your face shine on us

There is no one like You
There is no one like You, God
And all my hope is in You
Jesus, Jesus, Jesus, Jesus

To Your name
We give all the glory
To Your name
We give all the praise

You’re alive
Our God everlasting
So let Your face shine on us

To Your name
We give all the glory
To Your name
We give all the praise

You’re alive
Our God everlasting
So let Your face shine on us
So let Your face shine on us
So let Your face shine on us

Amazon Music Unlimited, Track 12 of A Beautiful Exchange